This was taken in 2001 when I came back from my Honeymoon. I was only a couple of dress sizes smaller than I am now, but I look so slim and I hope to look like that again.
Don't forget to check out what I'm doing over at A Mothers Ramblings too!
Slim Me Inspiration - Wordless Wednesday
Don't forget to check out what I'm doing over at A Mothers Ramblings too!
Bedtime And Exercise
I've been going to bed at a decent time for a few weeks now, and I'm loving waking up bright and early. I wonder what will happen when the mornings start getting darker again, I know that we haven't had the Summer yet, but Winter is just around the corner and I hope that I'm into a good gym routine by then.
I've worked out that for me it's best for me to get to the gym first thing. It's quiet (as it seems only a handful of people can manage a 6am start), most of my family are still asleep, it's a great way to start the day, and I can start the day knowing that I've already done the hardest part.
I've also noticed over the last few days that when I exercise first thing in the morning that I do it without thinking, without realising that I'm pushing myself harder. Looking at the work out charts the machines log for me I can see that each session I am steadily pushing harder each time. I'm clocking up more miles each time and I've come to the conclusion that one of my favourite pins on Pinterest is actually true.
I just hope my brain doesn't catch up with me until going to the gym every morning is a habit.
I've worked out that for me it's best for me to get to the gym first thing. It's quiet (as it seems only a handful of people can manage a 6am start), most of my family are still asleep, it's a great way to start the day, and I can start the day knowing that I've already done the hardest part.
I've also noticed over the last few days that when I exercise first thing in the morning that I do it without thinking, without realising that I'm pushing myself harder. Looking at the work out charts the machines log for me I can see that each session I am steadily pushing harder each time. I'm clocking up more miles each time and I've come to the conclusion that one of my favourite pins on Pinterest is actually true.
I just hope my brain doesn't catch up with me until going to the gym every morning is a habit.
Making Time for Exercise
I used to make excuse after excuse with regards to how I couldn't fit exercise into my day. I couldn't do anything during the day because I would have to stop every time Big Boy decided that he wanted my attention. I couldn't do anything at night because as well as not liking to work out in front of Flyfour I was just too tired after a day of doing whatever it is that I do. I couldn't do it in the morning as I was asleep, I couldn't do it at the weekend as that is family time.
Recently I knew that things had to change, I couldn't keep making excuses. I had to take control. I had plans for the Summer, I was going to get the children controlling my exercise. They had to force me to go to the outdoor gym in the morning, to play on the Wii or Xbox in the afternoon and we would have to fit in things like going swimming, going for a walk and a picnic, going to the park and lots more besides and all around these two standing appointments.
When I joined the gym, Flyfour said to me that I had to go at least four times a week to the gym and swim once in order to make it worth the cost of the membership. I was really worried, how on earth was I going to take all this time out of my week to go the gym? I clean and cook, look after the children, make packed lunches, watch TV, read books, spend time with my family, Blog, Tweet, play games on the computer, take my Mum shopping and on top of that and a lot of other things I need to sleep too.
My turning point came when I realised that I had to make time to exercise, I had to make sure that in all the things I have to do in a day that I made sure that exercise was in there somewhere. This is how I'm doing it so far.
I go and run round my garden for ten minutes before I eat lunch or dinner (I already work out in the morning before breakfast) and that way I know that I am getting in at least twenty minutes of aerobic exercise each day. If I am on the phone instead of sitting and chatting I walk round my kitchen, or the living room. As I am on the phone to my Mum everyday for about fifteen minutes, my sister for about a half hour a week and I speak to my Nan for around forty-five minutes a week and I walk at about 4mph that means I walk around 12 miles a week just whilst I'm on the phone!
I speak with Flyfour and the children about plans for the next couple of weeks and then I schedule in my exercise around any prior commitments. I have synchronised my phone calender with my Google calender, added my husband and then I can keep a note of everything. As it's scheduled I know that I have to go or I might not have time later.
My sister started her running not long after I started going to the gym. We've made plans that we are going to go running together and possibly run a marathon or a half marathon together next year. I don't want to let her down and so I know that I have to train now so that I can be ready in the future.
I'm also loving the support that I am getting from everyone here on the blog, on Facebook and on Twitter. I love posting my random updates when I'm going to the gym, at the gym or leaving after a work out and getting the retweets, comments and encouragement from everyone. I feel like everyone wants me to succeed and I don't want to be the reason everyone is let down.
After the first two weeks of the early morning workouts I realised I was smiling in recognition at other gym members and they were smiling back. We got to know each other through sweating together and they have been encouraging me to push myself harder than I thought possible, they've been teaching me better technique. I know that if I don't go one morning they are going to question me why the next time I do go.
Of course I also managed to work out that exercising with my family is a great thing. Going to the park and working out by running round with them, playing football or just going for a walk was a great way to pack in some family time and exercise.
I decided to go to the gym when the gym first opens, (every weekday morning at 6am) instead of sleeping in or laying in bed reading. I get up, get to the gym and get done all before the children are out of bed. It's been great, and is a perfect way to start the day. I've found that I'm getting more done, I'm exercising more during the day and even though it feels that I'm not seeing Flyfour as much I know that I'm doing something that will extend my time with him in the long run.
So that's how I'm making time for exercise. Are there any other ways I could squeeze in more?
Don't forget to check out what I'm doing over at A Mothers Ramblings too!
Recently I knew that things had to change, I couldn't keep making excuses. I had to take control. I had plans for the Summer, I was going to get the children controlling my exercise. They had to force me to go to the outdoor gym in the morning, to play on the Wii or Xbox in the afternoon and we would have to fit in things like going swimming, going for a walk and a picnic, going to the park and lots more besides and all around these two standing appointments.
When I joined the gym, Flyfour said to me that I had to go at least four times a week to the gym and swim once in order to make it worth the cost of the membership. I was really worried, how on earth was I going to take all this time out of my week to go the gym? I clean and cook, look after the children, make packed lunches, watch TV, read books, spend time with my family, Blog, Tweet, play games on the computer, take my Mum shopping and on top of that and a lot of other things I need to sleep too.
My turning point came when I realised that I had to make time to exercise, I had to make sure that in all the things I have to do in a day that I made sure that exercise was in there somewhere. This is how I'm doing it so far.
Walk before I eat
I go and run round my garden for ten minutes before I eat lunch or dinner (I already work out in the morning before breakfast) and that way I know that I am getting in at least twenty minutes of aerobic exercise each day. If I am on the phone instead of sitting and chatting I walk round my kitchen, or the living room. As I am on the phone to my Mum everyday for about fifteen minutes, my sister for about a half hour a week and I speak to my Nan for around forty-five minutes a week and I walk at about 4mph that means I walk around 12 miles a week just whilst I'm on the phone!
Schedule it
I speak with Flyfour and the children about plans for the next couple of weeks and then I schedule in my exercise around any prior commitments. I have synchronised my phone calender with my Google calender, added my husband and then I can keep a note of everything. As it's scheduled I know that I have to go or I might not have time later.
Go with a Friend
My sister started her running not long after I started going to the gym. We've made plans that we are going to go running together and possibly run a marathon or a half marathon together next year. I don't want to let her down and so I know that I have to train now so that I can be ready in the future.
I'm also loving the support that I am getting from everyone here on the blog, on Facebook and on Twitter. I love posting my random updates when I'm going to the gym, at the gym or leaving after a work out and getting the retweets, comments and encouragement from everyone. I feel like everyone wants me to succeed and I don't want to be the reason everyone is let down.
Do it Together
After the first two weeks of the early morning workouts I realised I was smiling in recognition at other gym members and they were smiling back. We got to know each other through sweating together and they have been encouraging me to push myself harder than I thought possible, they've been teaching me better technique. I know that if I don't go one morning they are going to question me why the next time I do go.
Of course I also managed to work out that exercising with my family is a great thing. Going to the park and working out by running round with them, playing football or just going for a walk was a great way to pack in some family time and exercise.
Get up early
I decided to go to the gym when the gym first opens, (every weekday morning at 6am) instead of sleeping in or laying in bed reading. I get up, get to the gym and get done all before the children are out of bed. It's been great, and is a perfect way to start the day. I've found that I'm getting more done, I'm exercising more during the day and even though it feels that I'm not seeing Flyfour as much I know that I'm doing something that will extend my time with him in the long run.
So that's how I'm making time for exercise. Are there any other ways I could squeeze in more?
Don't forget to check out what I'm doing over at A Mothers Ramblings too!
The End Of The First Week
The first week of my Gym membership is almost over and I've survived. It may only have been a week, but I feel fitter, I feel energised and I know that I'm going to carry on working towards my goal of losing ten stone and as a side benefit get fit.
The week was fairly easy when I think about it, all but that first five minutes of that first work out, when I wanted to give up. This is what I did in the end;
Tuesday - I went for my Induction or as it is otherwise known, a half hour of Hell.
Wednesday - I went Swimming, 30 lengths of 25m in 30 minutes.
Thursday - I went to Aquafit in the evening, I know now this to be 45 minutes of Hell.
Friday - 30 minutes of Gym and a 30 minute bike ride. And a 45 minute walk, a 30 minute swim of treading water.
Weekend Off being A Mothers Ramblings.
Monday - 30 minutes of Gym followed by ten minutes of Swimming.
I discovered this morning that despite feeling ready more more exercise after a thirty minute workout on various machines in the gym I can't swim afterwards. I managed to do 125m before almost drowning. Still, at least I know now and I know that if I try again in a month it will be a good measure of how far I've come.
A comment left by HMS on a post this past week was about a quote that she had seen somewhere. I knew what quote she meant as I read it as I'd seen it on Pinterest a hundred times in the past and ignored it, because for me then it didn't apply. Anyway I decided to create a visual of the quote in my new colours (you noticed I have a new design right?) here at Pippa World.
I am so proud of myself because I've started lapping those who sit on the couch.
The week was fairly easy when I think about it, all but that first five minutes of that first work out, when I wanted to give up. This is what I did in the end;
Tuesday - I went for my Induction or as it is otherwise known, a half hour of Hell.
Wednesday - I went Swimming, 30 lengths of 25m in 30 minutes.
Thursday - I went to Aquafit in the evening, I know now this to be 45 minutes of Hell.
Friday - 30 minutes of Gym and a 30 minute bike ride. And a 45 minute walk, a 30 minute swim of treading water.
Weekend Off being A Mothers Ramblings.
Monday - 30 minutes of Gym followed by ten minutes of Swimming.
I discovered this morning that despite feeling ready more more exercise after a thirty minute workout on various machines in the gym I can't swim afterwards. I managed to do 125m before almost drowning. Still, at least I know now and I know that if I try again in a month it will be a good measure of how far I've come.
A comment left by HMS on a post this past week was about a quote that she had seen somewhere. I knew what quote she meant as I read it as I'd seen it on Pinterest a hundred times in the past and ignored it, because for me then it didn't apply. Anyway I decided to create a visual of the quote in my new colours (you noticed I have a new design right?) here at Pippa World.
I am so proud of myself because I've started lapping those who sit on the couch.
Possibly The Best Wife In The World
There are lots of reasons why I am possibly the best wife in the world, but for the last two weeks I have been the best wife in the world because I have given up my Sunday lay in. My lovely long luxurious, only me in the bed lay in.
We split the weekend lay in's in this house, with Flyfour getting the Saturday and me getting the Sunday. It works for us and means that we each get some quality one on one time with the children and a good long lay in, but of course on special days that fall on a Sunday it does mean I get cheated out of my lay in.
Last week was of course Fathers Day and so as well as getting up on the Saturday, I got up with the children on the Sunday. We don't need to go into detail of how I didn't feed the children anything other than fruit and managed to convince Flyfour that we should go for a McDonalds breakfast for us all and we don't need to explain that I sat in the den playing a computer game with the children for a large part of the morning, the point is I gave up my lay in without a qualm.
I'm very giving me.
Then yesterday, Flyfour decided that he would give BB and I a lift to the train station so that we could spend the day with Dairylea and AMR Blog friends. This meant that his lay in was tragically cut short and so in a moment of guilt I decided that I should give up my Sunday lay in to make up for this. Like I said, I'm very giving.
We of course will extend the courtesy offered to me about my silence over what I did last Sunday morning and won't say anything about how Flyfour spent the vast majority of yesterday on the PC, with Tops playing in the den on the PC and watching a film after all he did do a couple of loads of washing to make up for that. We won't say anything about how he went out and brought some special treats for himself and Tops for lunch as I did get a rather lovely buffet out with Dairylea and we won't say anything about him buying Top Ender a new mobile phone (It's a Samsung Galaxy Europa) because he did let me join a gym this week.
Let's just not forget that I am possibly the best wife in the world as I gave up my lay in for the second week in a row.
We split the weekend lay in's in this house, with Flyfour getting the Saturday and me getting the Sunday. It works for us and means that we each get some quality one on one time with the children and a good long lay in, but of course on special days that fall on a Sunday it does mean I get cheated out of my lay in.
Last week was of course Fathers Day and so as well as getting up on the Saturday, I got up with the children on the Sunday. We don't need to go into detail of how I didn't feed the children anything other than fruit and managed to convince Flyfour that we should go for a McDonalds breakfast for us all and we don't need to explain that I sat in the den playing a computer game with the children for a large part of the morning, the point is I gave up my lay in without a qualm.
I'm very giving me.
Then yesterday, Flyfour decided that he would give BB and I a lift to the train station so that we could spend the day with Dairylea and AMR Blog friends. This meant that his lay in was tragically cut short and so in a moment of guilt I decided that I should give up my Sunday lay in to make up for this. Like I said, I'm very giving.
We of course will extend the courtesy offered to me about my silence over what I did last Sunday morning and won't say anything about how Flyfour spent the vast majority of yesterday on the PC, with Tops playing in the den on the PC and watching a film after all he did do a couple of loads of washing to make up for that. We won't say anything about how he went out and brought some special treats for himself and Tops for lunch as I did get a rather lovely buffet out with Dairylea and we won't say anything about him buying Top Ender a new mobile phone (It's a Samsung Galaxy Europa) because he did let me join a gym this week.
Let's just not forget that I am possibly the best wife in the world as I gave up my lay in for the second week in a row.
Aquafit - It's harder than it looks!
A few months back for Big Boys birthday we went swimming. Whilst we were there I got to watch an Aquafit lesson and I tweeted that as soon as Big Boy was at School I was going to join this class. It looked fun, there was plenty of Disco music being played and whilst it looked easy I could tell that it was a good work out. Plus who doesn't want to hang out with a group of old women in swimming costumes for an hour each week?
When I joined the gym earlier this week, the chap getting the commission suggested that I join a couple of classes as they are included in the price of membership. The chap suggested that I should go to Aquafit and a spin class. I thought it must be fate, there I had been only a month before thinking of joining the class and here I was being told that I had already paid for it!
So yesterday evening I went to my first Aquafit class. I tried talking to a couple of women, one just plain blanked me (I think she didn't actually speak English) and another gave me that half smile that I give people when I don't want to talk to them... soon enough though we were in the water and we didn't have time for talking.
For the next 45 minutes I swear that all I heard was;
JUMP HIGHER!
FASTER!
PUSH THOSE ARMS TOGETHER!
IF YOU WORK HARD YOU'LL BURN AROUND 800 CALORIES SLACK AND IT'S ONLY AROUND 300!
Eventually we got a brief breather and one of the other women and I exchanged grins, names and a few other details. I made an Aquafit Buddy! It was a very long 45 minutes, but I felt really invigorated afterwards and even my legs didn't feel as stiff as they had before the class. I'll definitely be going back to the class next week and when BB goes to school I'll be joining the Tuesday morning class too. I want to hang out with the old ladies!
When I joined the gym earlier this week, the chap getting the commission suggested that I join a couple of classes as they are included in the price of membership. The chap suggested that I should go to Aquafit and a spin class. I thought it must be fate, there I had been only a month before thinking of joining the class and here I was being told that I had already paid for it!
So yesterday evening I went to my first Aquafit class. I tried talking to a couple of women, one just plain blanked me (I think she didn't actually speak English) and another gave me that half smile that I give people when I don't want to talk to them... soon enough though we were in the water and we didn't have time for talking.
For the next 45 minutes I swear that all I heard was;
JUMP HIGHER!
FASTER!
PUSH THOSE ARMS TOGETHER!
IF YOU WORK HARD YOU'LL BURN AROUND 800 CALORIES SLACK AND IT'S ONLY AROUND 300!
Eventually we got a brief breather and one of the other women and I exchanged grins, names and a few other details. I made an Aquafit Buddy! It was a very long 45 minutes, but I felt really invigorated afterwards and even my legs didn't feel as stiff as they had before the class. I'll definitely be going back to the class next week and when BB goes to school I'll be joining the Tuesday morning class too. I want to hang out with the old ladies!
Swimming and Playlist Suggestions Please!
Last night before I went to sleep, I set my alarm for 5:40 am. I figured that would give me enough time to get out of bed, brush my teeth, get dressed and head to the Swimming Pool for the 6am opening time. It felt too early so I gave myself a five minute lay in and snuggled into Flyfour before creeping downstairs and heading off.
Getting into the pool I was ready for the swim, my legs were sore from the night before but I knew that the swimming would do them good and I'd loosen up. I swam a couple of lengths, going faster than some of the people in my lane, slower than others, smiled at a few of the other women in the same lane as me and looked at the time. I worked out that if I kept going I could do 30 lengths (each length is 25m) in 30 minutes and so I started chanting that to myself. Whilst it isn't going to set the swimming world on fire, I figure it's a good place for me to start. Who knows maybe in a few months I'll be swimming 60 lengths in 30 minutes?
I'm already getting lots of support from everyone on Facebook and Twitter and Paul has reminded me that I need to create a playlist to listen to whilst I'm working out to encourage me, motivate me and help me not think about what I am doing but to just get a move on and do it.
So I need suggestions of music to do just that. What should I include? What would you include?
Getting into the pool I was ready for the swim, my legs were sore from the night before but I knew that the swimming would do them good and I'd loosen up. I swam a couple of lengths, going faster than some of the people in my lane, slower than others, smiled at a few of the other women in the same lane as me and looked at the time. I worked out that if I kept going I could do 30 lengths (each length is 25m) in 30 minutes and so I started chanting that to myself. Whilst it isn't going to set the swimming world on fire, I figure it's a good place for me to start. Who knows maybe in a few months I'll be swimming 60 lengths in 30 minutes?
I'm already getting lots of support from everyone on Facebook and Twitter and Paul has reminded me that I need to create a playlist to listen to whilst I'm working out to encourage me, motivate me and help me not think about what I am doing but to just get a move on and do it.
So I need suggestions of music to do just that. What should I include? What would you include?
The First Workout
I went to the Gym this evening for my induction. I was scared and worried, but I knew that this first workout was important. Getting one workout done means I would be ready for the next and the next and the next and the next and before I know it going to the gym will be a habit and not one that I want to give up.
For the first four weeks I've been put on an easy introduction to gym workouts. It's roughly a 35minute workout concentrating on a cardio workout with a little resistance thrown in too. I'm really recording it here so that I remember how I started, so in a few months I'll be able to look back and see how far I've come.
I started off doing ten minutes on the cross trainer. I hate the cross trainer. I hate the cross trainer with a passion but I was told that was all the more reason to get on it. After four minutes my legs were aching, my heart felt like it was going to explode and I wanted nothing more than to get off the blasted machine. I knew thought that I couldn't. I knew that I had to carry on and suddenly just like that the pain was gone. It was able to carry on. I might have been out of breath and turning a shade of red, but I did that first ten minutes at the speed I was supposed to and survived.
We moved on to the treadmill, where I found the pace to be really too slow and asked if I could increase it. Look at me, my first work out and already trying to make it harder! Even at the faster speed I was able to tweet that I was at the gym and keep in stride. Every 30 seconds I had to increase the incline and after a while the instructor came back to check out how I was getting on. The instructor stood on the back of my machine and after a while asked if I was okay. When I said I was fine he said he was surprised seeing as how he had been standing on the back of the treadmill to make the incline steeper. I hadn't even noticed!
I was taught some basic resistance using a medicine ball and a stability ball before I moved on to the bike. The last ten minutes of the work out, were really easy, I know I was supposed to be cooling down and getting ready to go for a shower, but I felt like I could go on for longer.
I was advised to mix it up. To do things in a different order each time I went so that my muscles didn't get used to doing things in a certain order and adapt to that. As I left, as I came home I felt excited. I felt good and ready to go again. I almost did, when I walked into the living room and found Daddy ready to eat a bowl full of buttery popcorn!
It's only now, a few hours later that I'm starting to feel stiff and sore and thinking that maybe going swimming in the morning isn't as good an idea as I thought it would be! I'm going though. I'm not going to give up after one visit and waking up early to go swimming is my new morning routine too!
.JPG "Day One. 20st 8lbs")
.JPG)
For the first four weeks I've been put on an easy introduction to gym workouts. It's roughly a 35minute workout concentrating on a cardio workout with a little resistance thrown in too. I'm really recording it here so that I remember how I started, so in a few months I'll be able to look back and see how far I've come.
I started off doing ten minutes on the cross trainer. I hate the cross trainer. I hate the cross trainer with a passion but I was told that was all the more reason to get on it. After four minutes my legs were aching, my heart felt like it was going to explode and I wanted nothing more than to get off the blasted machine. I knew thought that I couldn't. I knew that I had to carry on and suddenly just like that the pain was gone. It was able to carry on. I might have been out of breath and turning a shade of red, but I did that first ten minutes at the speed I was supposed to and survived.
We moved on to the treadmill, where I found the pace to be really too slow and asked if I could increase it. Look at me, my first work out and already trying to make it harder! Even at the faster speed I was able to tweet that I was at the gym and keep in stride. Every 30 seconds I had to increase the incline and after a while the instructor came back to check out how I was getting on. The instructor stood on the back of my machine and after a while asked if I was okay. When I said I was fine he said he was surprised seeing as how he had been standing on the back of the treadmill to make the incline steeper. I hadn't even noticed!
I was taught some basic resistance using a medicine ball and a stability ball before I moved on to the bike. The last ten minutes of the work out, were really easy, I know I was supposed to be cooling down and getting ready to go for a shower, but I felt like I could go on for longer.
I was advised to mix it up. To do things in a different order each time I went so that my muscles didn't get used to doing things in a certain order and adapt to that. As I left, as I came home I felt excited. I felt good and ready to go again. I almost did, when I walked into the living room and found Daddy ready to eat a bowl full of buttery popcorn!
It's only now, a few hours later that I'm starting to feel stiff and sore and thinking that maybe going swimming in the morning isn't as good an idea as I thought it would be! I'm going though. I'm not going to give up after one visit and waking up early to go swimming is my new morning routine too!
.JPG "Day One. 20st 8lbs")
.JPG)
Can You Help Me?
I have asked those who follow me on Twitter and who talk with me on Facebook, and now I'm asking those of you who read A Mothers Ramblings and Pippa World to help me if you can.
As you all know I thought about joining a gym, I then joined a gym and now I have to go to that gym at least four times a week so that I can make the most of my membership, so that I can lose the weight I want to, so that I can become fitter and healthier and be an example for not only my children but those who find my story on the internet. People who are far cleverer than me suggested that I explain why I want to go to the gym, not only to help it fix in my head, but also to give them reasons to tweet me and ask how my weight loss and gym adventure is going. So here it goes.
I am so overweight it isn't funny. You know those charts where they show you what your BMI is? I'm not even on the chart. I thought I hid it well, I thought that people looked at me and saw someone over weight but not morbidly obese but then I saw a woman in the supermarket who looked about my size. I asked my Mum if I was right, and told her to be honest she told me that the woman in the supermarket was about my size. She was a different shape to me, but she looked so bad. She looked like I did and I don't want to look like that any more.
I saw a woman last night who picked up a size 12 bikini. She was buying it for herself, but when I had looked at her I hadn't thought of her as a size 12. My body image is so screwed that I thought she was a size 14 possibly even a 16. I have the opposite problem with me though. I look at me wearing a size 24 and think I'm a size 18. I need to adjust this and I think the only way I can do that is by changing my own body. I want to be a size 12.
I want to be able to run
I'm fed up of being out of breath walking up the stairs, I'm fed up of making excuses with my son that I don't want to chase him round the garden, or to the School, or around the park. I'm fed up of being on the sidelines. I used to run, I loved running long distance, but as I got more and more unfit I made up more and more excuses. I want to be the one that runs and enjoys it again.
Right now give me the option of going for a walk or sitting on the sofa and I'll take the sofa. I don't want that to be my life, I want to think hmm shall I go for a run or shall I sit on the sofa and I want to choose the run. I want to be able to say to my family, lets go for a game of football up the park, I want to go for walks with them, go on bike rides and just be active together.
I don't want Tops and BB to struggle with their weight. I want them to understand from an early age that exercise is important, that working towards a goal is important, that taking care of yourself is important. I don't want Tops or BB to look at me and think "Well, Mum's fat so it's hereditary. That's why I'm fat". I want them to look at me and know that I work at being in shape and that they do too.
This is a hard one to tell you all about. I love my husband so much, but I don't understand how he can find me attractive. I don't understand how he can want to have sex with someone who looks like this. I think if I feel better about myself that I might understand why he loves me and I think that then I might see the benefits in my sex life too.
I'm not even sure if this is true to be honest, I'm not sure if my family is complete or not. I do know though that I'm getting older and getting older increases risks in pregnancy. I know that being older and being over weight increases those risks even more and just in case we aren't done I need to be healthy.
I'm at risk for so many things. Diabetes, heart disease to name just two. If I'm overweight I am increasing my chances of other risks. I'm not ready to die, my children, my husband, my family need me and at the moment I'm the only one who can make the changes I need to.
So there you go, straight off the top of my head the reasons I want you to tweet me, to facebook me, to text me (if you have my number), to tag me in posts asking me how I'm doing, to ask me to my face when you see me when I last exercised, when I'm next going to exercise, how much weight I've lost, what dress size I'm in. Anything you think that might encourage me to do this and to do it properly.
Please can you help me?
As you all know I thought about joining a gym, I then joined a gym and now I have to go to that gym at least four times a week so that I can make the most of my membership, so that I can lose the weight I want to, so that I can become fitter and healthier and be an example for not only my children but those who find my story on the internet. People who are far cleverer than me suggested that I explain why I want to go to the gym, not only to help it fix in my head, but also to give them reasons to tweet me and ask how my weight loss and gym adventure is going. So here it goes.
I want to lose ten stone
I am so overweight it isn't funny. You know those charts where they show you what your BMI is? I'm not even on the chart. I thought I hid it well, I thought that people looked at me and saw someone over weight but not morbidly obese but then I saw a woman in the supermarket who looked about my size. I asked my Mum if I was right, and told her to be honest she told me that the woman in the supermarket was about my size. She was a different shape to me, but she looked so bad. She looked like I did and I don't want to look like that any more.
I want a better body image
I saw a woman last night who picked up a size 12 bikini. She was buying it for herself, but when I had looked at her I hadn't thought of her as a size 12. My body image is so screwed that I thought she was a size 14 possibly even a 16. I have the opposite problem with me though. I look at me wearing a size 24 and think I'm a size 18. I need to adjust this and I think the only way I can do that is by changing my own body. I want to be a size 12.
I want to be able to run
I'm fed up of being out of breath walking up the stairs, I'm fed up of making excuses with my son that I don't want to chase him round the garden, or to the School, or around the park. I'm fed up of being on the sidelines. I used to run, I loved running long distance, but as I got more and more unfit I made up more and more excuses. I want to be the one that runs and enjoys it again.
I want to enjoy exercise
Right now give me the option of going for a walk or sitting on the sofa and I'll take the sofa. I don't want that to be my life, I want to think hmm shall I go for a run or shall I sit on the sofa and I want to choose the run. I want to be able to say to my family, lets go for a game of football up the park, I want to go for walks with them, go on bike rides and just be active together.
I want to be an example for my Children
I don't want Tops and BB to struggle with their weight. I want them to understand from an early age that exercise is important, that working towards a goal is important, that taking care of yourself is important. I don't want Tops or BB to look at me and think "Well, Mum's fat so it's hereditary. That's why I'm fat". I want them to look at me and know that I work at being in shape and that they do too.
I want a better sex life
This is a hard one to tell you all about. I love my husband so much, but I don't understand how he can find me attractive. I don't understand how he can want to have sex with someone who looks like this. I think if I feel better about myself that I might understand why he loves me and I think that then I might see the benefits in my sex life too.
I want another child
I'm not even sure if this is true to be honest, I'm not sure if my family is complete or not. I do know though that I'm getting older and getting older increases risks in pregnancy. I know that being older and being over weight increases those risks even more and just in case we aren't done I need to be healthy.
I want to be healthy
I'm at risk for so many things. Diabetes, heart disease to name just two. If I'm overweight I am increasing my chances of other risks. I'm not ready to die, my children, my husband, my family need me and at the moment I'm the only one who can make the changes I need to.
So there you go, straight off the top of my head the reasons I want you to tweet me, to facebook me, to text me (if you have my number), to tag me in posts asking me how I'm doing, to ask me to my face when you see me when I last exercised, when I'm next going to exercise, how much weight I've lost, what dress size I'm in. Anything you think that might encourage me to do this and to do it properly.
Please can you help me?
I joined a gym
Oh crap.
Finally after what seems like years about moaning about my weight, after countless diets, exercise fads and general procrastinating I've joined a gym. I have to say that it was in the most thanks to my lovely husband, who after seeing me at the outdoor gym at the weekend suggested that really the fee for joining a proper gym with all mod cons wasn't that much in the grand scheme of things.
And I wouldn't get letched at by the drunk on the bench any more either.
I gave my husband 24hours to back out of agreeing to spend a huge amount of money before deciding I was going to do this. I called a few gyms, spoke to the sales team, asked to speak to a fitness instructors and then made appointments with the ones I thought I got on best with. A little over four hours later I had signed on the dotted line, been handed my new all access gym pass and was buying some clothes in Asda suitable to work out in.
Oh crap.
My induction to the gym is this evening at 7pm, I know what my goals are and I know what I want to do to lose it but I know that the instructor I'm meeting will be the one to listen to.
I want to lose ten stone. Scratch that. I need to lose ten stone.
I'm going to do it slowly, I'm going to get there in time for my 35th birthday which is May 2nd 2014.
That's 682 Days away or 97 Weeks and 3 Days. I can do that right?
It's over £1000 in gym membership away. Bloody hell, that's a lot of money.
Oh crap.
Finally after what seems like years about moaning about my weight, after countless diets, exercise fads and general procrastinating I've joined a gym. I have to say that it was in the most thanks to my lovely husband, who after seeing me at the outdoor gym at the weekend suggested that really the fee for joining a proper gym with all mod cons wasn't that much in the grand scheme of things.
And I wouldn't get letched at by the drunk on the bench any more either.
I gave my husband 24hours to back out of agreeing to spend a huge amount of money before deciding I was going to do this. I called a few gyms, spoke to the sales team, asked to speak to a fitness instructors and then made appointments with the ones I thought I got on best with. A little over four hours later I had signed on the dotted line, been handed my new all access gym pass and was buying some clothes in Asda suitable to work out in.
Oh crap.
My induction to the gym is this evening at 7pm, I know what my goals are and I know what I want to do to lose it but I know that the instructor I'm meeting will be the one to listen to.
I want to lose ten stone. Scratch that. I need to lose ten stone.
I'm going to do it slowly, I'm going to get there in time for my 35th birthday which is May 2nd 2014.
That's 682 Days away or 97 Weeks and 3 Days. I can do that right?
It's over £1000 in gym membership away. Bloody hell, that's a lot of money.
Oh crap.
Choccywoccydoodah!
I'm a huge Choccywoccydoodah fan, I love watching the TV show and the new series is about to start on Good Food (weeknights at 9pm from Monday 2nd July and it's on series link and record because I don't want to miss an episode) and then I watch it again on Sunday afternoons with Tops and BB who love looking at the cake creations, but fast forward the rest of the show.
I personally love the relationships between the staff (I know they live in and around Brighton, but really? Are they really not playing up for the camera?) and I've learnt how to do a few different cake designs thanks to them too... don't worry though the dog poo cakes were my own creation. I didn't learn that from them.
The only complaint I have (other than they are too far away from me being in Brighton) is that they can't sing.
Good job they have their cake skills to fall back on.
Esther Rantzen Needs To Look In Her Bloody Fridge
Budgeting is a huge part of my life and I've gotten quite good at it. I plan the meals in advance, I plan lunches in advance, I plan how to save money for holidays, Birthdays, Christmas, Easter, Days Out and rainy day treats. You get the idea. I go food shopping every week with my Mum and when I saw a post on MoneyWise by Esther Rantzen about being punished for eating alone I was interested as my Mum lives alone and I'm only too aware of how unfair supermarkets are to singles but the post actually just pissed me off. To me it smacks of I'm old and famous so listen to me denounce supermarkets and food manufacturers whilst not placing any blame on myself!
I can identify with the post to start with, yes packs of food are sold to families rather than singles, there are multi buy offers which you feel you are being ripped off on if you don't take advantage of, a lot of ready meals are designed for more than one person to eat and this can lead to a lot of waste but Esther takes the stand that this is the supermarkets fault and not hers. Esther claims that her freezer is full of "corpses of salmon and casseroles, rock hard and covered with a thick layer of snow" but that isn't her fault of course, it's the Supermarkets for only selling Salmon fillets in packs of four. I'm pretty sure Supermarkets can stand up for themselves but seriously Esther you're famous for talking no nonsense and here you are talking a load of bollocks. How hard is it to look in a freezer before you go shopping to see what you do or don't need to buy even if you are 71?
Esther claims that her fridge gets full of leftovers that she throws away because she doesn't use them, or food which isn't as tempting looking the day after it's been cooked gets thrown away. WHAT? Seriously she's going to bitch how a roast chicken she cooked one day looks dry the next so she is going to throw the whole bird away and this is the Supermarkets fault for not selling things in single packs?
Here's a few suggestions for you Esther that might help your grocery bill be reduced and they will work for "normal" people too.
1) Look in your bloody freezer and fridge. See what food you have in there and plan your meals around them. It's what the rest of the population do, it's what sensible people do, it's what you should do.
2) Invite another single friend to go shopping with you. When there are multi pack deals split them with them. You know if you buy oranges on a buy on get one free deal give your friend the free oranges. She can do the same to you with the free potatoes or whatever. Or here's a suggestion, you know that food bank at the local church? Give your extra canned goods to them, find out if there is a food bank that takes fresh food, donate it to the woman that lives down the road with the kids that scream too loud when you're trying to watch a TV programme, find a homeless shelter and give it to them! There is always someone grateful for food.
3) Invite friends round for dinner. Maybe on Monday it could be Moaning Esther Mondays and you serve a group of friends a Roast Chicken and extras. On Tuesday you could go to your friends house and have Salmon Fillets with new potatoes and on Wednesday you could go to another friends and have Casserole... you get where I'm going with this right? Yeah, it requires a bit of planning, but I'm sure you can handle it.
4) Cook a meal for four and portion it out in the freezer. Look at that you can have one of those meals a week for the next four weeks and it's, wait for it, just like a ready meal!
Don't get me wrong, I actually like Esther Rantzen and she does have a point, there should be more affordable food in individual portions but until Supermarkets work out a way to make money out of it she should do something more constructive than contribute to the food waste.
To end on a funny note, here is one of my favourite comedians talking about the same thing.
I can identify with the post to start with, yes packs of food are sold to families rather than singles, there are multi buy offers which you feel you are being ripped off on if you don't take advantage of, a lot of ready meals are designed for more than one person to eat and this can lead to a lot of waste but Esther takes the stand that this is the supermarkets fault and not hers. Esther claims that her freezer is full of "corpses of salmon and casseroles, rock hard and covered with a thick layer of snow" but that isn't her fault of course, it's the Supermarkets for only selling Salmon fillets in packs of four. I'm pretty sure Supermarkets can stand up for themselves but seriously Esther you're famous for talking no nonsense and here you are talking a load of bollocks. How hard is it to look in a freezer before you go shopping to see what you do or don't need to buy even if you are 71?
Esther claims that her fridge gets full of leftovers that she throws away because she doesn't use them, or food which isn't as tempting looking the day after it's been cooked gets thrown away. WHAT? Seriously she's going to bitch how a roast chicken she cooked one day looks dry the next so she is going to throw the whole bird away and this is the Supermarkets fault for not selling things in single packs?
Here's a few suggestions for you Esther that might help your grocery bill be reduced and they will work for "normal" people too.
1) Look in your bloody freezer and fridge. See what food you have in there and plan your meals around them. It's what the rest of the population do, it's what sensible people do, it's what you should do.
2) Invite another single friend to go shopping with you. When there are multi pack deals split them with them. You know if you buy oranges on a buy on get one free deal give your friend the free oranges. She can do the same to you with the free potatoes or whatever. Or here's a suggestion, you know that food bank at the local church? Give your extra canned goods to them, find out if there is a food bank that takes fresh food, donate it to the woman that lives down the road with the kids that scream too loud when you're trying to watch a TV programme, find a homeless shelter and give it to them! There is always someone grateful for food.
3) Invite friends round for dinner. Maybe on Monday it could be Moaning Esther Mondays and you serve a group of friends a Roast Chicken and extras. On Tuesday you could go to your friends house and have Salmon Fillets with new potatoes and on Wednesday you could go to another friends and have Casserole... you get where I'm going with this right? Yeah, it requires a bit of planning, but I'm sure you can handle it.
4) Cook a meal for four and portion it out in the freezer. Look at that you can have one of those meals a week for the next four weeks and it's, wait for it, just like a ready meal!
Don't get me wrong, I actually like Esther Rantzen and she does have a point, there should be more affordable food in individual portions but until Supermarkets work out a way to make money out of it she should do something more constructive than contribute to the food waste.
To end on a funny note, here is one of my favourite comedians talking about the same thing.
When I Was Fifteen
Nicki over at Curly and Candid has been baring all about when she was 15. She asked for stories about when others were 15, I don't really remember a lot about that age, I think I've blocked them all. It was before I went through a rebellion and turned into what I could only describe as now as a "troubled child" but I remember a few things.
I remember being lonely as I stopped hanging around with one group of friends and didn't have another group to belong to.
I remember that I didn't need ID to buy cigarettes or alcohol and so was the one everyone always asked to buy it for them.
I remember thinking that my life was crap and that there was no point to it all.
I remember thinking I knew it all.
I remember being skinny.
I do remember.
I wish I could go back to the me of then and let me know that things turn out okay. That the friends I thought I needed I didn't, new ones would come. Ones that would text me when I was sad, ones that would invite me to their weddings, ones that would be special and wouldn't understand just how special they are.
I wish that I could go back and say, look life is sometimes a bit shit but if you didn't have these bad times how would you ever know the highs of the good?
I don't really wish I could change anything, if I did then I wouldn't be me and despite all my flaws I'm rather lovely. There is nobody else just like me.
I guess to sum it up Justin Bieber was born the year I turned 15. That says it all really doesn't it?
I remember being lonely as I stopped hanging around with one group of friends and didn't have another group to belong to.
I remember that I didn't need ID to buy cigarettes or alcohol and so was the one everyone always asked to buy it for them.
I remember thinking that my life was crap and that there was no point to it all.
I remember thinking I knew it all.
I remember being skinny.
I do remember.
I wish I could go back to the me of then and let me know that things turn out okay. That the friends I thought I needed I didn't, new ones would come. Ones that would text me when I was sad, ones that would invite me to their weddings, ones that would be special and wouldn't understand just how special they are.
I wish that I could go back and say, look life is sometimes a bit shit but if you didn't have these bad times how would you ever know the highs of the good?
I don't really wish I could change anything, if I did then I wouldn't be me and despite all my flaws I'm rather lovely. There is nobody else just like me.
I guess to sum it up Justin Bieber was born the year I turned 15. That says it all really doesn't it?
She just doesn't want to come to dinner does she?
My sister had such an eventful week last week, it was almost like if something was going to go wrong it would go wrong. So when she called me in the middle of the day last Thursday I joked as I answered the phone "What disaster has happened now?!" she said that my Mum was being rushed to hospital with a suspected Stroke. There is a family joke that when I ask my Mum to come for dinner and plan something special that she becomes ill and so I thought at first my sister was winding me up, but I realised that she wasn't.
I was in the middle of making Top Enders Friday Lunch, a Star Quiche, when I got the phone call. I posted a tweet about what was happening (because that is my support system), phoned my husband and then went back to making my quiche. I didn't know what else to do, I couldn't go to the hospital as I didn't know what hospital it was that my Mum was going to and if it was the one I thought she was going to I needed to know what I was facing as the last time I was at this particular hospital, was when I went to say Goodbye to my Gran. I agreed with my sister that if she went with my Mum to the hospital I would go the next day, what would have been my Gran's birthday what is my Niece's birthday.
I had texts and DM's from friends checking I was okay and asking if there was anything they could do and letting me know that they were thinking of and praying for my Mum and my family. They meant so much to me, as did the little pep talk that Vic gave me via text message the next day when I was at the hospital having made a fool of myself and not thought about visiting times and so having turned up before visiting hours had started. I did eventually get to see my Mum and it's been confirmed now that it wasn't a stroke but she has Bells Palsy.
Today my Mum should be coming home and I'll be picking her up before bringing her straight back to my house to have dinner. If for some reason she isn't discharged I might just have to kidnap her from the hospital. She isn't getting out of coming to dinner again!
To leave on a happier note though, my Mum was going to be babysitting for my sister on the Friday night, so I bravely agreed to step in for her. As many of you know my sister has four children under the age of five and I've only ever babysat for two of them at the same time (admittedly with my two so I was looking after four under five too) and so I was worried but I wasn't going to tell my sister that! Luckily though my nieces were all complete darlings as this beautiful picture shows;
Here's to this week being a better week.
I was in the middle of making Top Enders Friday Lunch, a Star Quiche, when I got the phone call. I posted a tweet about what was happening (because that is my support system), phoned my husband and then went back to making my quiche. I didn't know what else to do, I couldn't go to the hospital as I didn't know what hospital it was that my Mum was going to and if it was the one I thought she was going to I needed to know what I was facing as the last time I was at this particular hospital, was when I went to say Goodbye to my Gran. I agreed with my sister that if she went with my Mum to the hospital I would go the next day, what would have been my Gran's birthday what is my Niece's birthday.
I had texts and DM's from friends checking I was okay and asking if there was anything they could do and letting me know that they were thinking of and praying for my Mum and my family. They meant so much to me, as did the little pep talk that Vic gave me via text message the next day when I was at the hospital having made a fool of myself and not thought about visiting times and so having turned up before visiting hours had started. I did eventually get to see my Mum and it's been confirmed now that it wasn't a stroke but she has Bells Palsy.
Today my Mum should be coming home and I'll be picking her up before bringing her straight back to my house to have dinner. If for some reason she isn't discharged I might just have to kidnap her from the hospital. She isn't getting out of coming to dinner again!
To leave on a happier note though, my Mum was going to be babysitting for my sister on the Friday night, so I bravely agreed to step in for her. As many of you know my sister has four children under the age of five and I've only ever babysat for two of them at the same time (admittedly with my two so I was looking after four under five too) and so I was worried but I wasn't going to tell my sister that! Luckily though my nieces were all complete darlings as this beautiful picture shows;
Here's to this week being a better week.
Why do I deserve to win a ticket to Britmums live?
Why do I deserve to win a ticket to Britmums live? Well, Claire seems to think it's because I've been blogging for years and it's at events like these where we get to meet up and have a good giggle. There are hundreds of other bloggers who deserve a ticket to go to the event so they can meet up with other bloggers that they might not have met in real life. I've been blogging for years and in that time I've become fairly well known in blogging circles; For example Vic and I were in a lift before Cybermummy and two other bloggers got in the lift with us, asked if I was PippaD said how great it was to meet me and then got out at the next floor. I have no idea who they were, but they knew me! Of course I do know a lot of other bloggers and I love being able to say "Hello" to them as normally I think that they live in my computer but as much as I would love a ticket for meeting up with my friends, I don't think this is the reason I deserve to win a ticket.
I've been very lucky to have won three national awards for A Mothers Ramblings, (Two MAD's for Family Fun and Best Mummy Blog at the Gurgles) so you might think that I pretty much know everything about blogging that one could know.
It's not true, there is still tonnes for me to learn and I'm trying to! There are going to be sessions at BritMums Live that I would love to go to that would help me increase my knowledge and give me starting points on new things that I want to learn and try. There are going to be talks that I would love to hear, questions asked by other bloggers that I would never have thought of and a chance to hear what others think. It's not greedy of me to want to win a ticket, I can't afford one and those whom I've approached about sponsoring me have not had the budget. Partly I do think that this is why I deserve to win a ticket. I want to learn, I want to improve and it's this knowledge that I pass on to others.
The other reason as to why I want to win a ticket? I want to be able to come home to a clean house, with fed children, the laundry washed, folded and put away, a nice meal cooking and hopefully something nice cooking for me. That's right whilst I'm away I'd love my husband to do my job, because he is much better at it than me.
Of course if sponsorship was offered (£300-£400 to cover tickets, transport and accommodation) there would be advertising space here and on AMR offered in return and of course mentions in write ups about the day... I could even add an advert to my new TV Channel (I know right?!) and when I finally get back round to doing my podcasts they can be name dropped there too. I don't think it's a bad deal.
I've been very lucky to have won three national awards for A Mothers Ramblings, (Two MAD's for Family Fun and Best Mummy Blog at the Gurgles) so you might think that I pretty much know everything about blogging that one could know.
The other reason as to why I want to win a ticket? I want to be able to come home to a clean house, with fed children, the laundry washed, folded and put away, a nice meal cooking and hopefully something nice cooking for me. That's right whilst I'm away I'd love my husband to do my job, because he is much better at it than me.
Of course if sponsorship was offered (£300-£400 to cover tickets, transport and accommodation) there would be advertising space here and on AMR offered in return and of course mentions in write ups about the day... I could even add an advert to my new TV Channel (I know right?!) and when I finally get back round to doing my podcasts they can be name dropped there too. I don't think it's a bad deal.
The Natural Glossy Box
The latest Glossy Box arrived late last week and it was celebrating Earth Month and titled "The Natural Box". I opened it up (pleased that something hadn't leaked as had in a previous box). It looked great in the box and as it's my Mums birthday today I thought that she might like to have the box. I haven't actually given it to her yet because I'm going to see her tonight, but I think she'll love it.
Inside the box this month there is;
Caudalie which is a Vinosource SOS Thirst-Quenching Serum which is a plant based serum to ensure your skin never lacks moisture. Fullsize it is 30ml and costs £29.00
Inika Cosmentics Organic Lip Liner which is £11.75 and the colour we got was Sugar Plum. It's quite nice and a colour my Mum will wear.
Monu Professional Skincare Hand and Nail cream which is a nice treat as my mum loves having her nails done and so needs to keep her cuticles healthy!
Figs and Rouge Lip Balm is Peppermint and Tea Tree "flavoured" and at £3.29 for a 8ml tin I think it's a bargain, especially as it isn't Petroleum based and that means that I might be able to get some for Flyfour in a more manly flavour.
Philip B Styling Gel is £13 for 178ml and is a multi purpose soft hold gel that adds volume and texture and my Mum will love it. I just hope she isn't after we buying her more for her birthday as I haven't got the funds just at the moment!
I'm quite impressed with the box this month and if it wasn't my Mums birthday and therefore making me feel generous this would be straight into my make up bag for immediate use!
Inside the box this month there is;
Caudalie which is a Vinosource SOS Thirst-Quenching Serum which is a plant based serum to ensure your skin never lacks moisture. Fullsize it is 30ml and costs £29.00
Inika Cosmentics Organic Lip Liner which is £11.75 and the colour we got was Sugar Plum. It's quite nice and a colour my Mum will wear.
Monu Professional Skincare Hand and Nail cream which is a nice treat as my mum loves having her nails done and so needs to keep her cuticles healthy!
Figs and Rouge Lip Balm is Peppermint and Tea Tree "flavoured" and at £3.29 for a 8ml tin I think it's a bargain, especially as it isn't Petroleum based and that means that I might be able to get some for Flyfour in a more manly flavour.
Philip B Styling Gel is £13 for 178ml and is a multi purpose soft hold gel that adds volume and texture and my Mum will love it. I just hope she isn't after we buying her more for her birthday as I haven't got the funds just at the moment!
I'm quite impressed with the box this month and if it wasn't my Mums birthday and therefore making me feel generous this would be straight into my make up bag for immediate use!
A Birthday List
It's my birthday in just a few weeks and I've made a list of birthday gifts that people might like to buy me for being so fab or because they love me or more likely because they want some of my cake. Actually I've made it because it will stop people asking me and it's also helping me to focus my mind for once!
A new handbag.
I love this Roxy Love Me Messenger Bag. Every time I walk past Boros (I make sure we walk past the shop every time we go to the Shopping Centre) I see it in the window and linger a little to look at it. As my current favourite over the shoulder messenger type bag is stained, ripped and the zipper broken I think this would be a good replacement... And it's pretty!
A portable charger.
I love my Nokia Lumia, I really do but logging in to Foursquare, reading my Emails, Tweeting and updating my Facebook status drains my battery far too quickly. I need a Portable Charger to keep in my handbag so I can whip it out when needed and not worry about running out of juice before I go home for the day!
Garden Lights
I brought two sets of the solar lights from Instore/Poundstretcher last year and put one round the children's play house and another around a climber. I love looking out at dusk into the garden and seeing the lights on, and would love to have more lights to wrap into the branches of our fruit trees. I think it would make sitting in our garden really special come dusk in the summer.
Hair Straighteners
My sister told me that I didn't want Garden Lights for my birthday but that I wanted some GHD's. Apparently that would make my new hair easier to make straight rather than relying on my really bad blow drying skills. I'm still not sure that I agree, I think that my sister just wants some new GHD's and figures that if I don't use them she can swap her old ones for my new one!
Now I guess I had just better think about what kind of cake I'm going to have!
A new handbag.
I love this Roxy Love Me Messenger Bag. Every time I walk past Boros (I make sure we walk past the shop every time we go to the Shopping Centre) I see it in the window and linger a little to look at it. As my current favourite over the shoulder messenger type bag is stained, ripped and the zipper broken I think this would be a good replacement... And it's pretty!
A portable charger.
Garden Lights
I brought two sets of the solar lights from Instore/Poundstretcher last year and put one round the children's play house and another around a climber. I love looking out at dusk into the garden and seeing the lights on, and would love to have more lights to wrap into the branches of our fruit trees. I think it would make sitting in our garden really special come dusk in the summer.
Hair Straighteners
My sister told me that I didn't want Garden Lights for my birthday but that I wanted some GHD's. Apparently that would make my new hair easier to make straight rather than relying on my really bad blow drying skills. I'm still not sure that I agree, I think that my sister just wants some new GHD's and figures that if I don't use them she can swap her old ones for my new one!
Now I guess I had just better think about what kind of cake I'm going to have!
Glossybox - Harrods Edition
Thanks to A Mothers Ramblings I get a lot of things sent to me to review or because PR's think I might like something based on having worked with me before. One of the things that I get the PR version of but hardly talk about is the Glossybox boxes which I normally pass to my sister after having a quick nose inside, because I don't do makeup and so the things aren't really any use to me and I think it's a shame for them to go to waste. This month however when I looked inside and saw that it was a special Harrods box I knew my sister wasn't going to get a look in!
Harrods is not only world famous for it's luxury brands but for it's quality too and as I am a huge Harrods fan these samples were all mine. I haven't used them all yet so I can't tell you about the products but in my box I have the following;
Bliss - Blood Orange and White Pepper Body Butter
Revive - Intensite Creme Lustre SPF30
Versace - Vanitas Versace Eau De Parfum
Lancome - Juicytubes Toffee R 'N' B 93 (it really is toffee smelling!)
Clarins - Extra-Firming Body Cream
I just put some of the Juicytube on, it really is so toffee smelling. I feel like I've just eaten a toffee! I've smelt everything else in the box and they all smell fab, so I can't wait to use them, especially as there isn't any make up!
Harrods is not only world famous for it's luxury brands but for it's quality too and as I am a huge Harrods fan these samples were all mine. I haven't used them all yet so I can't tell you about the products but in my box I have the following;
Bliss - Blood Orange and White Pepper Body Butter
Revive - Intensite Creme Lustre SPF30
Versace - Vanitas Versace Eau De Parfum
Lancome - Juicytubes Toffee R 'N' B 93 (it really is toffee smelling!)
Clarins - Extra-Firming Body Cream
I just put some of the Juicytube on, it really is so toffee smelling. I feel like I've just eaten a toffee! I've smelt everything else in the box and they all smell fab, so I can't wait to use them, especially as there isn't any make up!
I'm Sick And Grumpy
I went to bed just before 1am last night. I didn't feel right and just couldn't move from the sofa, but I had watched all the TV I could manage and had written up the Smubbles review. I was tired and I knew that unless I went to bed now I would end up sleeping on the sofa. So I climbed the stairs, popped into BB's room to check if he needed the toilet, checked on a sleeping Tops and then climbed into bed. It was 1:09am.
I closed my eyes and the room started spinning. I felt sick, but reassured myself I was just overtired and this was causing the spinning. It was 1:10am.
I put my foot on the floor, risking it being eaten by the alligators that live on the floor in the night, as I had read somewhere that "anchoring" yourself when the room is spinning could stop the sensation. Apparently that only works if you are drunk. It was 1:11am.
I turned over and looked at my husband sleeping in bed, my eyes were heavy but I knew if I closed them the spinning would start again. Somehow I managed to fall asleep. Sweet blissful sleep. Then there was a scream of "MUM" from BB and I pulled myself awake realised that now I was standing the room and I were spinning avoided the obstacle course around my bed and made for BB's room. It was 1:14am
Quickly calming BB down I agreed to sleep in his room, knowing that he would be asleep in seconds and I could make my way back to my bed. He lay down whilst I stared at the ceiling wishing the spinning would stop. BB looked at me and I could tell from the confused look on his face I didn't look good. I sat bolt upright grabbed the emergency use potty and threw up in it. And again. And again. It was 1:16am.
I sat on the edge of BB's bed willing the room to stop spinning so I could take the potty downstairs to get rid of the contents of my stomach. I looked at BB sleeping peacefully and knew I had to go before I woke him. I stumbled down the stairs and into the bathroom just in time to throw up again. It was 1:29am.
I'm not sure what happened next. Somewhere in the midst of sleep deprivation and the room spinning I have blocked out the next few hours. I know I made it back to bed and assume I fell into a blissful sleep, or maybe I just passed out with exhaustion in the bathroom and slept walked back to bed.
I felt fine when I woke up, laughed at how Flyfour wanted to know why I hadn't told him (Well he was asleep! Did he want me to wake him to tell him I was ill?) and got on with my day. Until about an hour ago when I suddenly realised that the world was spinning again and I felt sick.
I hate being sick.
I closed my eyes and the room started spinning. I felt sick, but reassured myself I was just overtired and this was causing the spinning. It was 1:10am.
I put my foot on the floor, risking it being eaten by the alligators that live on the floor in the night, as I had read somewhere that "anchoring" yourself when the room is spinning could stop the sensation. Apparently that only works if you are drunk. It was 1:11am.
I turned over and looked at my husband sleeping in bed, my eyes were heavy but I knew if I closed them the spinning would start again. Somehow I managed to fall asleep. Sweet blissful sleep. Then there was a scream of "MUM" from BB and I pulled myself awake realised that now I was standing the room and I were spinning avoided the obstacle course around my bed and made for BB's room. It was 1:14am
Quickly calming BB down I agreed to sleep in his room, knowing that he would be asleep in seconds and I could make my way back to my bed. He lay down whilst I stared at the ceiling wishing the spinning would stop. BB looked at me and I could tell from the confused look on his face I didn't look good. I sat bolt upright grabbed the emergency use potty and threw up in it. And again. And again. It was 1:16am.
I sat on the edge of BB's bed willing the room to stop spinning so I could take the potty downstairs to get rid of the contents of my stomach. I looked at BB sleeping peacefully and knew I had to go before I woke him. I stumbled down the stairs and into the bathroom just in time to throw up again. It was 1:29am.
I'm not sure what happened next. Somewhere in the midst of sleep deprivation and the room spinning I have blocked out the next few hours. I know I made it back to bed and assume I fell into a blissful sleep, or maybe I just passed out with exhaustion in the bathroom and slept walked back to bed.
I felt fine when I woke up, laughed at how Flyfour wanted to know why I hadn't told him (Well he was asleep! Did he want me to wake him to tell him I was ill?) and got on with my day. Until about an hour ago when I suddenly realised that the world was spinning again and I felt sick.
I hate being sick.
The Moon and Tree out my Window - Wordless Wednesday
I had to take this picture because it was so lovely. I don't think that it has come out as great as it looked, but I can see it.
Celebration or Sadness?
Today is the anniversary of my Gran's death. It is also Top Ender's birthday. I know I have talked about this before but I feel that it was just so unfair for Top Ender's day to always be shadowed by the death of a beloved relative.
I told Top Ender that my Gran chose this day so that she would always be linked to her. That she wouldn't of wanted us to be sad, but to be glad for her life, for the love that she had shared and that of course now she is with her own parents and husband in heaven and that is why she died after Top Ender had gone to bed and her birthday was "over".
I can't help but feel that is a load of crap though.
If my Gran wasn't dead I could kill her for dying today. I mean I know it wasn't her choice, I know that her body just gave up and I understand that I do. It's just wrong and unfair.
Someone made a comment about a year after her death on a blog post of mine about how I hadn't stopped talking about her in the year since she had died. It made me upset, I didn't want to be filling AMR with mentions of death because I didn't want my children to look back and think that is all I was talking about but it was a HUGE event in my life. I wish now I had handled it better and told the person who left the comment to shut up but it's too late for that now.
So today after Top Ender has gone to bed and enjoyed her Eighth birthday I'm going to go to bed and have a cry in to my pillow about a wonderful woman who left us behind on a special day.
I told Top Ender that my Gran chose this day so that she would always be linked to her. That she wouldn't of wanted us to be sad, but to be glad for her life, for the love that she had shared and that of course now she is with her own parents and husband in heaven and that is why she died after Top Ender had gone to bed and her birthday was "over".
I can't help but feel that is a load of crap though.
If my Gran wasn't dead I could kill her for dying today. I mean I know it wasn't her choice, I know that her body just gave up and I understand that I do. It's just wrong and unfair.
Someone made a comment about a year after her death on a blog post of mine about how I hadn't stopped talking about her in the year since she had died. It made me upset, I didn't want to be filling AMR with mentions of death because I didn't want my children to look back and think that is all I was talking about but it was a HUGE event in my life. I wish now I had handled it better and told the person who left the comment to shut up but it's too late for that now.
So today after Top Ender has gone to bed and enjoyed her Eighth birthday I'm going to go to bed and have a cry in to my pillow about a wonderful woman who left us behind on a special day.
I'm Not The Only One Who Can Hear The Voices In My Head
It's Top Ender's birthday tomorrow and the first day back at school. I had planned to make her a great lunch for her Birthday so that she could celebrate in style all day, but over Christmas I kind of forgot to buy the supplies that I was going to need to create this fantastic lunch. I checked with Top Ender what it was that she wanted for lunch the next day, she came up with a couple of options which I knew I could get what I was lacking from the two local shops.
As I was walking along to the shop from the car, I realised it was quite cold and was thinking about how it seemed colder today than in recent days. It was only as I walked into the shop that I realised that I wasn't *thinking* this I was actually saying this out loud.
Oh the embarrassment.
"Stupid Girl" I called myself in the manner of Captain Mainwaring (Yes, that is how you spell it. I know these things, trust me.) "If you are going to talk to yourself at least do it in your head so nobody thinks you are crazy!" I realised again then that I had said this out loud.
Oh the shame.
I quickly made my purchases and left the store before anyone could get too good a look at me. I might have caused myself to be known as the crazy lady in the local shop, but at least I made a pretty cupcake for Top Enders packed lunch tomorrow...
As I was walking along to the shop from the car, I realised it was quite cold and was thinking about how it seemed colder today than in recent days. It was only as I walked into the shop that I realised that I wasn't *thinking* this I was actually saying this out loud.
Oh the embarrassment.
"Stupid Girl" I called myself in the manner of Captain Mainwaring (Yes, that is how you spell it. I know these things, trust me.) "If you are going to talk to yourself at least do it in your head so nobody thinks you are crazy!" I realised again then that I had said this out loud.
Oh the shame.
I quickly made my purchases and left the store before anyone could get too good a look at me. I might have caused myself to be known as the crazy lady in the local shop, but at least I made a pretty cupcake for Top Enders packed lunch tomorrow...
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